The Lost Jedi

It’s possible that Episode VIII was a Star Wars film. It’s even very likely. It might also be possible that the only way to make The Last Jedi better would be to replace a few letters in the title so that it is called ‘The Lost Yeti.

If this was the direction that Rian Johnson would have rather gone in, he would have been wise to cast Carice van Houten as a character who only wears a bikini. He would probably have to change the story to reflect the letters that were changed in the title, and also to reflect the addition of the bikini-clad character played Carice van Houten. At this point, Mr. Johnson would have to commit fully to his adjusted vision and create a film about Ms. van Houten trying to locate a Yeti.

Despite what Rian Johnson might or might not have wanted to change, all we can really say with certainty is that he wrote and directed a movie in which there was no Carice van Houten in a bikini and there was no Yeti.

Listen to the Royal review here…


Or listen to the Royal review in a galaxy far, far away…

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